A dream to be an Actress – Chapter 4 – All study and little acting

That horrible day and the hurting comment destroyed my confidence, which built brick by brick, into pieces. After that incident, all I wanted was to complete my school as soon as possible and run away to any new location and start everything fresh.

By God\’s grace, my dad again got a transfer when I completed my tenth standard and this time it was to Bhopal. As my sister was already studying in a college in Chennai and as my parents also felt it would be better for my future to study in Chennai, my mom and myself moved to Chennai with my sister. I usually despise change and yet, this time I felt completely relieved to move to Chennai and have a fresh start.

Owing to the good marks I obtained in the tenth standard, I was boarded in a reputed girls\’ school in which daughter of my dad\’s friend studied. By now, my teeth braces were gone and I was in my glorious sixteen. 

Chennai was so good to me and being in a girls school and in a place, where everyone spoke my mother tongue brought back my confidence. I slowly forgot all the unnecessary happenings that happened in Mumbai and become a new person as I always wished.

By this time, Tamilnadu had a new craze in another serial and this time it was teenagers who were excited about it than others. Kana Kaanum Kalangal. It was a coming-of-age type series where the protagonists were school students in their higher secondary (11th and 12th grade). As we were of the same age then, the craze was multi-fold and we were addicted to it. We even went to the extent where we recognized the characters and related with ourselves. But, as I was nearing the end of my eleventh standard, cable tv connection was disconnected in almost every one of my classmate\’s house to make them concentrate on the public exams. However, my parents decided otherwise and trusted me that I will use my freedom in the right way. I only watched this serial and the next day, I used to recite the whole serial without missing any dialogue to my friends. If I was on leave for even a single day, my friends said they missed my serial recitation and accompanied expressions more than me. 

It was my school\’s 25th year anniversary that year and the school decided to organize a grand event to commemorate the occasion. Within one year of joining this school, I was recognized as the top contenders for school-first in public exams next year and teachers held me with good respect. 

As the celebrations included skit and dance, teachers were recruiting different people and they never asked me as they decided I wouldn\’t take part in any such event, which is common for most such toppers. 
But, I wouldn\’t waste any chance to sharpen my skills and portray my talent and so, I ran towards the English teacher of mine and requested her to include me in the English skit. (Actually, I wanted to take part in Tamil Skit, but, I was scared if I could recite all lengthy Tamil dialogues.) She was surprised and asked me if I wasn\’t kidding for almost 3 times and finally accepted my request. I was given the role of Matilda, which had a negative shade and I practiced my dialogues happily and emoted in front of the mirror and every day then and I also made sure my studies were moving in the right way. I am a lazy person and I usually become tired easily with minimum pressure. But, this time I wasn\’t. Because, passion and love towards the thing we do make sure we aren\’t tired ever but, just excited.

Finally, the day arrived and somehow every teacher and the principal came to know that I was going to act in the skit. I could see they were also eager to see my performance. I may be an exaggerating a bit but, I could still remember my principal congratulating me after the performance. I performed well and the appreciations were more than what I expected. For the next one year, this role became my recognition despite my good marks and even many students from lower class started calling me Matilda Akka. And that was then I realized the power of the written characters over the actual real us. 

As the days neared public exams, I forgot everything around and was concentrating on my studies and nothing else. For the last 3 months, all I remembered and all I dreamt was my subjects and exam halls. The next year ran faster than expected but harder too and finally, I completed the dreaded public exams. 

My acting dreams went completely dormant in those days and only rare \”Matilda recognitions\” reminded me of the day and the joy I had and even after the exams, I was still preoccupied over the exams and continued having exam hall dreams until my results.

Result dates were announced and the night before my results, I couldn\’t sleep. I usually sleep early and rise early. I can never stay late. But, that night passed slower than any night of my life and I stayed all night and the morning I got the happy news. I was the school first and I have obtained enough marks to easily get into any of the best colleges of Tamilnadu. 

I slept happily after hearing the news and attending the numerous phone calls and showering in praises and when I opened my eyes, I felt feverish and I felt tired than ever and small rashes formed all over my face and body. 

I got Chickenpox.